A Wedding Toast

A best man is expected to deliver a toast that is witty, charming and memorable. A wedding toast is just like any other public speaking event except that most successful speakers have had hours of communication training and coaching before they address a large crowd, while the best man at a wedding usually has zero public speaking experience. Talk about some crazy pressure.

So, how do you alleviate this pressure?

Best man toasts should be prepared well in advance - not thrown together at the last minute. Like any speech, it should have a beginning, middle and closing. The speech traditionally honors the groom, but to be a success, you should recognize the bride, as well. Be sure to congratulate the two as a couple and make sure that your words are appropriate for general audiences of all ages.

As with any speech, remember to speak up when delivering your toast. Nervousness can take a toll on your volume, so pray for a good sound system and focus on your breath. And do not think for a minute that alcohol will help ease your nervousness. It won't. But it may cause you to deliver a slurred or incomprehensible speech. Breathe through the nervousness; pauses are welcomed breaks and help to get your point across. And of course, slow down...it's best not to speak at a hundred miles an hour.

Nobody at the wedding reception expects you to deliver the next "I Had a Dream" speech. The biggest mistake you can make when toasting the happy couple is not being yourself. If you are not an especially funny guy, why would you consider opening with a joke? Do not feel like you have to take the same tone as other toasts you've heard. Identify your style and compose a toast that works for you because a toast that is authentic and real is much easier to deliver. Here's a bonus: the audience at a wedding is already warmed up by the happiness of the occasion. As long as you are sincere, the audience will be on your side. And speaking of the audience...don't forget that it's all about the audience. Too often speakers call attention to themselves thinking that they are the star of the show, but that is not the case. The speaker takes a back seat to the needs of the audience.

And last, but not least, it doesn't hurt to point out that the groom loves the bride and the bride loves the groom and if you do so, everyone will love you. If you need a shot of presentation confidence, spending a few hours with one of our executive faculty members will do the trick. At Ty Boyd, Inc., we focus on the communications skills that you need to work on most. Let us help you establish rapport with your audience and confront the fears and insecurities that often come with speaking in public.

How to Make a Good First Impression

Within a matter of seconds, the person you meet for the first time will judge you and your abilities based on your appearance, your attitude, and your body language. And that's before you even open your mouth. A first impression can last a lifetime and influence the way others perceive you, interact with you and respond to you. And if you are meeting this person in a business environment, that first impression not only applies to you, but most likely to your company, as well. 

The rules are the same - whether you are meeting somebody socially or speaking to them in a meeting at work...you have about ten seconds to make a good first impression. Remember, actions speak louder than words.

First things first - take a deep breath so that you come across as calm and confident. And be yourself. If you are not at ease, chances are the person you meet will feel ill at ease. And remember, you're never fully dressed without a smile. A smile says that you are approachable and glad to make the acquaintance. And a smile is able to convey that message without you having to say a single word.

When you meet somebody for the first time, regardless of where you are, get on your feet and extend a hand. In fact, as soon as you see them approaching, get up. It's a non-verbal way of showing that you are looking forward to the introduction. If you are sitting behind a desk or table, coming out from behind the furniture to show that you trust and respect the person.

Give the person you are meeting the courtesy of looking them in the eye. If your eyes are wandering, you will give the impression that you are waiting for somebody else. Let the person know that they are the center of your attention by simply maintaining a connection with your eyes.

If you are truly interested and open to learning about and understanding the person you are meeting, your desire will come across in the first impression...be genuine, be real.

In Ty Boyd's Excellence in Speaking course participants learn that a speaker's toolbox is stocked with all of the essentials for powerful communication. Students are introduced to the tools and are given practical tips before putting each one of them to work during the course. The tools become their personal and professional relationship skills enabling them to communicate effectively in all areas of life - at work, at home, with friends and, of course, when they are making those important first impressions.

Much of what you need to make a good impression is common sense, but with a little extra help and guidance, you can make a good impression...great. Let Ty Boyd Effective Communication & Coaching put you on the right track. 

A Culture of Appreciation

Employees are an organization's most valued assets. So, how do you protect and hold on to your assets?

Research shows that more people leave their jobs because of a lack of appreciation rather than a lack of compensation. Creating an atmosphere where employees are heard and appreciated goes a long way in reducing employee turnover. When employees feel that their efforts are recognized, they are more productive and contribute to the overall well-being of the organization.

Sure, money, title and power are all a part of the formula, but when it comes to taking care of your most valued asset, a culture of appreciation makes a huge impact on both the passion and profitability of an organization. Look at it this way: appreciation isn't just a means of recognition to the work that has been done, it is a source of motivation for the future.

So, what is the best way to show your appreciation?

Make it authentic; don't try to overstate your appreciation because chances are it will come across as fake and contrived. You don't have the best assistant in the whole wide world, but you do have a darn good assistant; "the best assistant in the whole wide world" sounds like something you'd see on a coffee mug. Be genuine, be real and it will mean a lot more to the recipient. 

Be personal and specific when showing your appreciation - a generic "Way to Go" email blast has little significance to the individuals who worked on a project. Take a minute and address the email using your colleague's name, make it as personal as possible stating specific contributions. Acknowledging the person's individual efforts goes a long way when showing your appreciation. Of course, it's even better if you can deliver the acknowledgement in person rather than via email.

You'll find that for some people, kind words are not enough. In fact, they can be viewed with skepticism and misconstrued as manipulative. Be aware that actions speak louder than words. For these employees, it's best to show your appreciation. That doesn't necessarily mean with a cash incentive, sometimes spending time with them or lending a hand with a task is the best way to show that you appreciate them. Taking the time to understand what an employee values goes a long way and makes a big impact. For some, being recognized publicly in a social setting is exactly what they want and need. For others, given the choice of getting up in front of a crowd or gnawing off their own right arm, they will choose the latter. Find out what works best and communicate your appreciation accordingly.

Studies show that corporate cultures that value and encourage gratitude are among the best places to work. And the good news is, organizations can deliberately infuse their workplace with an attitude of gratitude; it can come from anybody, regardless of their position or title. Our clients tell us that one of the things we do best is assisting them in communicating and cultivating an attitude of gratitude in their workplaces. The coaches at Ty Boyd Effective Communication & Coaching are here to assist you and your organization. Give us a call.